I am currently writing under a slight influence of alcohol and complete lack of sleep.
I am ashamed. My attitude towards academics has not changed from last semester. My faith has not change.
My life has been quite dull and unimpressive.
I have let down my parents all through high school and past my freshman year, and here, I am about to repeat this process.
This is when I realize what is wrong with me, and I feel the need to change.
I do not have a purpose to my life. I do not have any goals that will help me grow as a human being. The only goal I have would be to make money.
Every time I sit on my desk, useless thoughts constantly enter and leave my head. I feel no urge to get to my best. I have no sense of competition. I dwell in the average. I try to find the easy way out of everything.
What have I taken with me last semester? Nothing.
There is no point in saying positively reinforcing advices to myself anymore, because there is no way I am going to be doing worse than this.
I am rotten from inside to the outside.
Never have I been this pessimistic about myself.
